The older I get, the more it seems like social and political issues that I never cared about start to bother me. One of the issues that I still couldn’t care less about is gender equality though. Women want to be treated fairly in the workplace, as well as on the streets, and all I can think is that most of them are whiny bitches. I said most. If you’re reading this, I’m not talking about you…. obviously.
Do I even need to state that it shouldn’t be an issue, since women have been on this planet as long as men? Apparently so, since I just fucking typed it. Men took over as the controlling gender immediately, according to the bible, so that HAS to be true. I’m going to take it upon myself to come to the assumption that the ladies didn’t even want control to begin with, so they nagged the men to handle the load. I’m assuming this partly because it’s something I experience twice a week minimum. Every day off I have with my wife, the topic of going out to eat comes up. Does she ever have a suggestion of where to go? Of course not! “I don’t care baby, whatever you want.”. Drives me up the wall every time. A bad example, I’ll admit. Worry not, I have more.
It seems to me that women only want equality when it’s convenient for them. I can’t stand domestic violence. I think wife beaters should be anally raped for eternity. But, there are cases where the tables are turned, and some white trash cunt decides to take a frying pan upside the head of her boyfriend of 20 years (on and off). Of course she starts crying her eyes out, and blabbering a sob story when the cops show up, because she knows they’ll buy it. In a world of equality, that lady would be pepper sprayed and slammed on the ground with a knee in her back, all while being called obscenities, with backup on the way.
Then there’s the topic of divorce. I have yet to see a case where a husband takes his rich wife for half of her fortune. I can’t read a newspaper where there isn’t a case of a woman taking her husband to the cleaners though. Take Elin Nordegren, aka ex Mrs Tiger Woods, aka lucky broad. “Lucky? He cheated on her with a bunch of skanks!”. Yep, lucky. She married Tiger, had a baby with him, then found out he was a man-whore. So, she chases him out of the house with, ironically, a golf club in her hand. He’s so freaked (and maybe drunk) that he crashes his SUV into a tree while escaping. Not only was Elin not charged with assault, she later divorced Tiger for a quarter of a billion dollars. First of all, what do you think would have happened had Tiger been the one doing the chasing, club in hand? You think his image is bad now, just imagine. Also, Elin is now engaged to a billionaire businessman. Glad to see that she marries for love…
That’s a pretty basic case of gold digging if you ask me. I only used that example because it’s the freshest in our minds. There’s plenty of other gold diggers out there though. Who could forget Anna Nicole Smith’s tried and true formula of marrying a wealthy elderly man? Why work for a living when you can fuck a rich guy, who already has a foot in the grave? You can’t beat that retirement plan! No person in their right mind, male or female, can debate the motives of these young beauties who marry rich old men. I have yet to see an elderly guy who is living off of social security score such a hottie.
The shoe is rarely, if ever, on the other foot. I don’t see any 25 year old men marrying rich elderly women. It might be because old ladies look disguting, making it nearly impossible to achieve an erection. I think I used the right word, because if you can get hard for the crypt keeper, it’s an achievement.
Before I stray too far from the point that I’m trying to make, I have to mention Shane Mosley. “Sugar” Shane Mosley, one of the greatest boxers ever, is getting divorced. Among the things his wife is taking from him is three of his championship belts. She says it’s so she can give them to her kids when they get older. She’s fooling nobody though. She’s doing it to hit him where it hurts. If it was for the kids, Mr Mosley is just as qualified to hand them down at the appropriate time.
Ok, let’s get back on track. Man-hating women who have rallies for equality are called “feminist”. If the roles are reversed though, the term is “chauvinist pig”. Fair? I don’t think so. But you don’t see men raising a big stink about it, because adults know that the world isn’t fair.
Speaking of gender hating, that’s a scale that tips way to one side as well. Look no further than the gay community for a prime example. I’m painting with a broad brush here, so don’t think that everything I state here is absolute. There’s always exceptions.
Gay men tend to be effeminate. They hang out with girls a lot, and are all around fun loving people. Ever seen a gay pride parade? It looks like a blast, men in thongs aside. Lesbians on the other hand give off a totally different vibe. They want nothing to do with men. Yet, for some odd reason, they look like men half the time. They have shaved heads, and wear sports bras that are too tight, to give off the impression that they have flat chests. They do everything they can to look masculine, yet the second you call one “sir”, you’re the asshole.
Look, I’m not even saying that the notion of equality is a bad one. I think it’s a good idea, but an impossible goal. In virtually every nation around the globe, men are in charge. I really don’t know why, but that seems to be the case. If you think it’s bad in America, take a look at the middle east. Women have to wear ridiculous robes, and walk two paces behind the men. They don’t even worship their false gods together, insane…
Making it more impossible of a goal is the representatives of the gender in America. For every true female role model you show me, I can reply with a joke of a woman. Maya Angelou? Paris Hilton. Rosa Parks? Kim Kardashian. Oprah Winfrey? Sarah Palin. The list goes on and on. Funny how all of the female heroes I mentioned are black. I’m not going to change it though, because those are damn fine women who I respect. (maybe not Oprah, but others respect her) White women should step their games up!
If women want to be taken seriously, and be considered equals, they need to all get on the same page. Men are power hungry. It’s in our DNA to be the alpha male. Some women want to run companies, lead the nation, and be taken seriously. The others are happy just fucking and sucking their way to fame and fortune, always smiling for the camera. So yeah ladies, before you start your vagina monologue inspired rant, with all the “I am woman, hear me roar” bullshit, which never seems to be without a man-hating segment, try turning the gun on yourselves for a change.
Behind every great man is a great woman. As true as that is, she’s behind him for a reason. Couldn’t end this without throwing a cheap shot in there. What can I say? I’m a dick…